There’s More Ocean in You than You Know – On Creativity in Relationship

Photo by Ryan Moreno on Unsplash

You know how you’ve made room for yourself in your life to be creative? You’ve handled your self-defeating and self-critical voices ENOUGH to be able to sit down and make something you don’t hate and actually want to share with the world?

If your relationship isn’t where you want it to be, my guess is that you haven’t done that same work around how you relate to yourself and others.

You haven’t liberated your creative genius yet in terms of how you relate to people, especially your partner. You’ve probably focused on what’s wrong with you, or what’s wrong with them, and tried to heal it instead.

While healing smooths out your daily experience and builds resourcefulness, it won’t ever give you the depth of fulfillment and joy your creative work gives you, because your attention is in the wrong place.

You’re trying to fix something you perceive as broken or flawed, instead of carving out access to your genius, like you did with your creativity.

Your childhood wounding around love and relationships has everything to do with why you haven’t done this yet.

These wounds carved a canyon in you so deep, the river of you flows through its banks thinking this is all the ocean you’ve got.

But there’s way more ocean in you than you know.

Your creativity may have been the delta through which your river flowed and remembered itself as ocean.

Your creativity may have been the one place you could show up and be yourself, unlike the way you had to shape yourself to survive in your family, school, and community.

I believe, and have seen in myself and my clients over and over again, that it’s possible to have the kind of relationship you have with your creative genius with another person when you change your focus from trying to heal and fix yourself (and them) to accessing your creative genius in your relationship.

Old wounds get healed along the way, but since you’re focusing on the liberation of your true self, your ocean, instead of on healing, your relationship enters a whole other level of fulfillment and joy that you couldn’t access before.

As a creative person, you may feel like you have to temper yourself to interact with the world, that your obsessive, questing nature is somehow a problem that has to be solved, or avoided, when dealing with other people.

I’d argue the opposite: that your obsessive, questing nature serves you just as much in your relationships as in your creative work if you learn how to honor and apply it in that domain.

The key is presence. You’ve trained yourself to bring your unique presence to bear on creating. But you likely haven’t brought your total and unique presence to your relationship in the same way.

You’ve done this before to be able to create. You can do it again to have a great relationship.

The relationship you desire is possible! Click HERE to discover what missing pieces are stopping you from having the connection and passion you desire.